Someone I love very much recently said to Cheryl, with me sitting close by, “I’m so tired of hearing about how white men are victims.” 

I think the issue for white men is that they are not seen as victims and so no one includes them in their speeches or policies. They feel ignored. By not being victims, they are victims.

Random accumulated thoughts

Schools teach facts to help young people succeed. Isn’t learning of things like empathy just as, or more, important?  Parents teach facts and empathy. Why can’t schools do that too?

Is “feeling another person’s pain” or slowing down for a car crash or watching horror movies similar to cutting oneself – wanting to feel something?

The more religious someone is in a movie, the likelier they end up as the bad guy. 

And kids are always smarter than the adults and are never killed in movies. When they are a character in a murder mystery, they almost always turn out to be at the heart of the solution.

And the good guys never eat in the movies. Eating is a sign that the character is weak...or about to be killed.

I can think of no more important purpose or reason to be grateful for having been born with a tongue, the title of this blog notwithstanding, than the important task of finishing off the ice cream in the bottom of the bowl.

List of Presidents I've seen in person

Richard Nixon - In October of 1980, I was working as a caseworker with intellectually-challenged adults in Phoenixville and was entering the Phoenixville Hospital to visit one of my "clients" as they were called then who had just had her first baby. As I walked toward the front door, I saw a commotion of sorts coming toward me including TV lights, cameras and 10-15 people. To my surprise, walking right toward me was the disgraced ex-President Nixon. Turns out, he was visiting his first granddaughter, born to Julie and David Eisenhauer, that same day. He was talking with anyone who would listen, about the Phillies 1-0 loss to the Astros in that afternoon's playoff game. With all that is happening now under this current abomination of a Presidency, it's hard to convey how much we hated disliked didn't care for hated Nixon. And here he was in front of me, with my one chance to tell him all the awful things I had said or thought about him during his time in office. Nope. I put out my hand, he shook it and we went on our separate ways. Opposite ways, of course.

Gerald Ford - In October of 1976, I was living on Front Street in Philadelphia with an old Quaker lady named Beatrice Kirkbride, who had agreed to let me stay on the 3rd floor of her house for the three months of my time on Earlham's Philadelphia program (where I interned as a sportswriter at the Germantown Courier and as a producer of Pete Silverman and Howard Eskin's sports news shows on WCAU-AM radio. Pete eventually became the executive producer of Flyers telecasts and hired me as the statistician sitting next to the announcers in the TV booth, starting in 1980 and ending in 2001.) 

One day, as I walked toward Center City for a class called Urban Studies (I think) with Andrea Mitchell, then a reporter at KYW and eventually on NBC (and who married Alan Greenspan who went on to become chair of the Federal Reserve), I noticed a group of 5-10 people gathered at the end of a street that was blocked off by the police, who were also standing guard.

I asked them what they were waiting for and they told me that Gerald Ford was staying in a a rowhome there on Delancey Street and was due to leave any moment to go to the Walnut Street Theatre to practice for the next evening's debate with Jimmy Carter. I asked one of the secret service men standing inside the blockaded area when he might come out and he would neither confirm nor deny who or why they were there but leaned closer and said in a low tone, "probably in the next ten minutes." 

About 15 minutes later, his limo came by and there the man was, looking out the window, giving us a perfunctory wave and then he was gone.

Jimmy Carter - I first saw President Carter from afar at Game 7 of the 1979 World Series in Baltimore, but seeing as how his seat was a little closer to the action that mine, I could only barely make him out. But here is the full story of my interaction with him: https://jmcvickar.blogspot.com/2015/05/brush-with-greatness-ii-james-earl.html 

Ronald Reagan - I don't actually remember ever having seen him in person.

George HW Bush - He attended the same volunteerism event referenced in the Jimmy Carter story above as did...

Bill Clinton - I also went to his inauguration on January 20, 1993 and saw him briefly as he rode by enroute to the White House for the first time as the most effective President in my lifetime. So far at least. 

I also saw him give a spellbinding speech at the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte in 2012 where he was called the "Secretary of 'Splainin' Things." 

George W. Bush - I don't actually remember ever having seen him in person either.

Barack Obama - We saw him give a speech about 10 minutes down the road from us at Great Valley High School on April 9, 2008. If you watch this video, you'll see Lissy at the 2:29 mark, and here you can see her in the red blouse sitting behind him.

I also saw him at the 2012 convention, of course, and then again at a rally for Kamala Harris in Philly (also with John Legend and Bruce Springsteen).

Donald Trump - Oddly enough, I saw him way back in the late 1990's at a Flyers-Rangers game, arriving quite late and sitting in the front row on the blue line all by himself. He watched the game with some, but not much, interest and I never once saw him interact with a single person the whole game. And I'm embarrassed to admit that I could barely take my eyes off him for much of the game.

Joe Biden - I must have seen him speak at the 2012 Convention but I don't remember it. 

And that covers it so far!

 My observation:

Democrats focus too much on asking questions and then obsess over considering all the possible answers without agreed on conclusions.

Republicans focus too much on accepting answers regardless of their defensible merit so they can move on to the next issue.

2 or 3 posts ago, I listed some thoughts I imagined sharing with my middle school students (but never did), and the last few were about judgement, specifically:

- Are we more interested in judging someone or being curious about them?

- If you don’t believe in judging people, don’t judge people who do.

Then last week, the NY Times published this article, titled:

How to Stop Being So Judgy

Here’s what you should do instead.

It gave three specific suggestions on what to do instead and the third one was:

"Swap judgment for curiosity and empathy."

I love those - two such powerful and often challenging practices in trying to replace judgement, but both helpful and productive both for oneself as well as the person we may be tempted to be "judgy" about. 

Maybe I'm not writing enough about sex

Recently, I received an email from Google Analytics (for the first time ever), showing me that this blog had received 82 visits in the past month, up 12.33% from, well, I don't know - it didn't say, and they were all from "new users".

Sort of impressive to have 82 new people come here considering I never reference it publicly and no one reads blogs anymore. 

Not as impressive? The "average engagement time" on my blog: 1 (ONE) second!

And that is down 95.14%, meaning they used to spend nearly, but not even, 2 seconds on the site?

Not surprising? All 82 users were new which means that no one who had ever been here ever came back. 

A few months back, I posted my thought about recognizing people who had been underrecognized for their accomplishments. 

Since then, I've found a few more and will link to them below, but there certainly is a common theme: almost all of them are female or belong to an ethnic or racial minority. And since the NY Times recently did an entire piece on women who had changed history over the past 100 years, I'll make this my last post on the subject, but since I had been collecting these, I might as well add them here.

- A pioneering paleontologist and avid fossil collector, Mary Anning’s discoveries have contributed significantly to modern-day science. But until recently, she was relatively unknown.

- Gladys West, a mathematician whose modeling of the Earth’s shape played a critical role in the development of GPS worked in near obscurity. She was almost 90 before she received any recognition for her work.

- A comedian's take on The Grapefruit Ladies of Ireland who helped end apartheid in South Africa.

And finally, my favorite, a story about a Philadelphia woman named Caroline Rebecca LeCount, who preceded Rosa Parks, but performed the same action, and whose name was almost lost to history.  

LeCount’s work is frequently likened to that of Rosa Parks. But, many officials celebrated her work as a basis for Park’s later work. 

“It has been suggested that Caroline LeCount was the Rosa Parks of her time, but since Caroline came before Rosa, I like to think that Rosa Parks was the Caroline LeCount of her time,” said Marianne McQuaid, a senior designer on Maps & Schedules with SEPTA.