My friend Jim Daly's prediction for this baseball season:
"Phils will have some tough times this year, and the press and public will frequently panic and yell and scream. But in the last 6 weeks, their pitching will be a huge advantage, and they will win the division again. Of course the Marlins will go 87-75, get the 2nd wild card, and win their 3rd WS without ever winning a single division. Some good fan will assassinate Selig, and in his honor, baseball with expand the playoffs to 8 teams in each league, and they will play for the Selig Trophy, a giant penis with a bad haircut, for the rest of our lives."
I've read that 4 times now, and have laughed out loud each time.