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Of Politics, Sports and Sex

OK, so there won't be a LOT on here about sex, but tell the truth, that's most of the reason you entered this site, right? So, I'll slip some things in from time to time just to keep you coming...back.

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Friday, November 19, 2010

Something tells me this is of way more interest to me than it would be to anyone else, but as usual that won't stop me from posting it here

...and on the subject of sex with other women now that I'm married (read the post below first if you need some context, tho it isn't too important), I think often of the scene in When Harry Met Sally, no not THAT one involving "what she's having", the one...well, this one:

Harry Burns: You realize of course that we could never be friends.

Sally Albright: Why not?

Harry Burns: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.

Sally Albright: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.

Harry Burns: No you don't.

Sally Albright: Yes I do.

Harry Burns: No you don't.

Sally Albright: Yes I do.

Harry Burns: You only think you do.

Sally Albright: You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?

Harry Burns: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.

Sally Albright: They do not.

Harry Burns: Do too.

Sally Albright: They do not.

Harry Burns: Do too.

Sally Albright: How do you know?

Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.

Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?

Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.

Sally Albright: What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?

Harry Burns: Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.

Sally Albright: Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.

Harry Burns: I guess not.

Sally Albright: That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.

That scene. I have referred to that scene to various young women, well, primarily just my oldest step-daughter who didn't believe me that "Harry Burns" was right when she was in high school, but by the time she was out of college, to her credit, did finally agree with me.
But the reason I refer to it here is in the perspective of an old, well soon-to-be 54 year-old, but happily-married fart such as myself in terms of havng women friends, and yet again, relying on the so far-boundless forgiveness of my wife.
I have many female friends, some of them very attractive, in fact some of them extremely sexy/attractive/shall I go on? and it struck me the other day how my view of them has changed. I really have no interest in any sense of physical interaction with them. Now, I know women are going to read this and say, well, duh, you're married, you're not allowed to, so of course you don't want to, but that's missing the entire point of Harry's spiel above.
Harry's point, and thus to a large extent, mine as well, is that we are biologically incapable of not thinking in those terms, or at least from an early age, probably starting at least at puberty, but maybe earlier, that is to not think of women as a conquest of some sort, as my 20's-something beach house buddies used to put it, calling ourselves Conquistadors, of course.
But anyway, back to today, or these days, not specifically today, as if it'll be different come Tuesday, I still find myself wanting the attention of attractive women, or even of their being attracted to me. I still want the most attractive young woman in any given seminar or conference to sit next to me, or in my breakout session, and I still look far too long at good-looking women walking down the street, the less they're wearing, the better. But to imagine hooking up with them, if they were to come on to me? I just don't find myself thinking that way anymore.
And honestly, it's a pretty big relief.


  1. I just caught up on a bunch of your blogs since the election, loving every one as always, but what a chuckle I get from it appearing that now that the election's over, all your thoughts are turning to sex, and relationships - funny! I'd sign off with 'keep it up', but... well....

  2. Or, rather, you should say that you just don't find yourself thinking that way anymore, until you can't get to sleep.